For weeks I've been waking up in worship...literally singing praise before I've even opened my eyes. No matter what else the day may bring, it starts joyfully with Jesus.
Today was different. I woke up feeling melancholy and couldn't shake it all day. Melancholy turned to tearfulness as soon as I sat down in church tonight & the weight of Good Friday fully settled upon me.
I know the joy that Sunday brings, yet I felt crushed tonight as I listened to the words to "Ah, Holy Jesus - Who was the guilty? Who brought this upon thee? Alas my treason, Jesus, hath undone thee! T'was I, Lord Jesus, I it was denied thee; I crucified thee."
How often do I deny Jesus when I censor my conversation so I don't offend those who don't share my faith? How many times have I betrayed Him when I strive for my own glory instead of working for His? Every time I sin I put Jesus on that cross and He exchanges it for grace.
The melancholy that turned to grief today was a gift too. It's a reminder of the most precious gift I will ever receive and how much it cost the Father and Son to give it, yet give it they did. It is finished.